Writer’s Profile

Paul J

Paul J

Paul doesn't have anything better to do, so he sits around all day surfing the internet and writing about whatever he thinks is funny. Oh, and Paul is not actually a cartoon character, but if he was, he would party with Magilla Gorilla and Wacko from Animaniacs.

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Blog: http://www.paulspond.com

Recent Blogs

  1. BluKillWhiteMarlIbuTunaTroutSaLobsteRimp: An Open Letter To John Madden

    BluKillWhiteMarlIbuTunaTroutSaLobsteRimp: An Open Letter To John Madden

    Posted by Paul J – Leave A Comment

    The new, improved, sea-food version of Madden's Thanksgiving classic, the Turducken.
  2. Big-Ass Easter Eggs: A Gallery

    Big-Ass Easter Eggs: A Gallery

    Posted by Paul J – 1 Comment

    Celebrate Jesus this Easter by making a gargantuan, unhealthy egg!
  3. 5 Saints Who Had Absolutely Nothing To Do With What They’re Known For

    5 Saints Who Had Absolutely Nothing To Do With What They’re Known For

    Posted by Paul J – Leave A Comment

    Amazingly, Saint Patrick is NOT the patron saint of vomiting green beer.
  4. Helen Keller Falls Off Stage

    Helen Keller Falls Off Stage

    Posted by Paul J – 1 Comment

    Because what your day is really missing is a little bit of wrong, wrong slapstick.
  5. 5 Sports That Were ALMOST Winter Olympic Events

    5 Sports That Were ALMOST Winter Olympic Events

    Posted by Paul J – Leave A Comment

    You think curling is bad? Here are some other near-misses for events trying to make it into the Olympics.
  6. 5 Best Auto-Tunes

    5 Best Auto-Tunes

    Posted by Paul J – 2 Comments

    I love the new era of R&B. Every singer, regardless of whether or not they have any singing ability, sounds like a male Cher on her 1998 “Believe” track. And [...]
  7. 10 Creative Dates To Get You Laid On Valentine’s Day

    10 Creative Dates To Get You Laid On Valentine’s Day

    Posted by Paul J – 1 Comment

    (without breaking your bank account, because otherwise I would just say get a limo to the airport, and fly her to Paris to have dinner at the top of the [...]
  8. 5 Racist Superbowl Ads

    5 Racist Superbowl Ads

    Posted by Paul J – Leave A Comment

    Ah, the Big Game. The one day per year when you use your Tivo to fast forward through the program to get to the commercials. And the day when [...]
  9. Ask Dr. Scientist: Will Humans Ever Get As Tall As Avatars?

    Ask Dr. Scientist: Will Humans Ever Get As Tall As Avatars?

    Posted by Paul J – Leave A Comment

    Dear Dr. Scientist: I just watched Avatar, and my friend said that humans are gonna be that tall someday, because people have been getting taller for the past 500 years.
  10. Crashing An Orgo Final

    Crashing An Orgo Final

    Posted by Paul J – Leave A Comment

    This is the story of how a college buddy of mine and I once crashed an organic chemistry final. No, not a frat party, or a sorority car-wash fundraiser — [...]

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