Haim died from an apparent drug overdose, which may or may not have been accidental. An autopsy will be conducted to determine the exact cause of death later this week.

Born in Toronto, Canada, Corey Haim rose to fame in the 1980’s after starring in such films as Silver Bullet, Lucas, The Lost Boys, License to Drive and Watchers. His addiction to drugs over the years was no secret, as Haim had been in and out of rehab numerous times. He cleaned up his life in 2004 and moved back to Toronto to start over, and in 2007 he starred in the reality TV show, The Two Coreys with his friend and 80’s co-star Corey Feldman. The show was cancelled after two seasons.

In 2008, Haim took out an ad in Variety magazine saying, “This is not a stunt. I’m back. I’m ready to work. I’m ready to make amends.”

His recent film credits include Crank 2 and Lost Boys: The Tribe, where he appeared in the closing credits of the film.

Police learned of Corey Haim’s death early Wednesday morning when staff at St. Joseph’s Hospital called authorities, said Sgt. Frank Albarren, of the LAPD’s North Hollywood station. He was with his mother, Judy, at the time of his overdose, and she was the one who called 9-1-1. He was found unresponsive at his home between Burbank and Hollywood Hills and rushed to the hospital. There are no other details of his death at this time.

(Photo via: whosdatedwho)

It’s no secret that I love beer. Lots and lots of beer. To me, there’s nothing better than kicking back after a hard days work with a cold one and relaxing. It’s like a little piece of Heaven on Earth. Inevitably though, I always find myself peeling off the labels of the bottle, and playing around with them. Well now you and I have a chance to play with our labels in a different way, thanks to Newcastle Brown Ale.

America’s number one imported ale (brought to us by the fine folks at Heineken) is holding a contest, in where you can design your own beer labels, and submit them for a chance to have your design featured on the Newcastle website.

“The Newcastle logo, with its unusual ‘cottage loaf’ shape and its iconic blue star, has inspired hundreds of photo collages and tattoo designs. We’re encouraging Newcastle drinkers to tailor individual labels with their own uniquely different, personalized touches,” said Colin Westcott-Pitt, Brand Director, Newcastle Brown Ale. “Our online program gives fans a chance to show off their artistic skills and, for one designer, on our Web site.  We expect our judging panel will be inspired by the variety of designs our fans will submit.”

Okay, how cool does that sound? I’m by no means a great artist, but based on my love of beer, I think this is something I’m going to have to try my hand at. Even if I don’t win, at least it will give me something to do while I’m chilaxin’ with my suds.

To enter, go to the Newcastle Brown Ale website before March 14, which they’ve totally revamped into an artists studio, and begin playing around with your digital design. Of course, you have to be 21 years-old to enter, and be a resident of the United States, but man, what a great chance to have your work featured.

Hey, it’s just another reason to love beer!

This summer, the classic 1984 flick, The Karate Kid, is getting a reboot thanks to Columbia Pictures.

Much like the original, this one takes a young boy out of his element, and plops him in a new setting where he’s faced with challenges that include other kids wanting to kick the crap out of him. He befriends a wise kung-fu teacher, who shows him the way of the martial arts, and life, and what it really takes to succeed from the inside out.

While it may have deviated from the original in the sense that the new Karate Kid is black (played by Will Smith’s son, Jaden), and the kung-fu teacher isn’t that old (Jackie Chan), it still looks to be sticking to the premise pretty well.

This is one remake that I’m actually looking forward to this year, and based on what I’ve seen from the trailer, it looks like it is going to kick some serious ass. Mind you, it’s just a trailer, but man, what a preview. Say what you will, but I think Columbia has a hit on their hands with this one, and even though the film hasn’t come out yet, I’m hoping that it will do well enough to warrant a sequel.

BANZAI!

With the Academy Awards just days away, you’d think it would be a time for celebration. I’m thinking Oscar parties, Oscar pools, hell, I’m even thinking Oscar the Grouch at this point. Oscar, Oscar, Oscar. The Academy of Motion Pictures Arts and Sciences though, they’re thinking a bit differently than the rest of us.

All of this mess started when Nicolas Chartier, one of the financiers and producers behind The Hurt Locker, sent out an email to some friends that went a little something like this:

“From: “Nicolas Chartier” Date: Fri, 19 Feb 2010

I hope all is well with you. I just wanted to write you and say I hope you liked Hurt Locker and if you did and want us to win, please tell (name deleted) and your friends who vote for the Oscars, tell actors, directors, crew members, art directors, special effects people, if everyone tells one or two of their friends, we will win and not a $500M film, we need independent movies to win like the movies you and I do, so if you believe The Hurt Locker is the best movie of 2010, help us!
I’m sure you know plenty of people you’ve worked with who are academy members whethere a publicist, a writer, a sound engineer, please take 5 minutes and contact them. Please call one or two persons, everything will help!

best regards,

Nicolas Chartier”

Voltage Pictures

Apparently the AMPAS frown on you when you badmouth another nominated film. In this case, Chartier referring to James Cameron’s AVATAR as that “$500M film.” So what did they do? They stripped him of his Oscar tickets and told him to hit the road, Jack.

The problem is, during awards season, everyone and their mother sends out emails to friends and colleagues asking them to vote for their film over the other guys. It’s a known fact, and one the AMPAS has condoned and tolerated for so long. Now all of a sudden they’re badmouthing The Hurt Locker for badmouthing AVATAR? Seems a bit hypocritical to me.

Whatever, man. If the AMPAS are going to ban Chartier from attending the Oscars, then they should ban at least 50 other filmmakers, producers, and directors from the show. Because his email got leaked though, they have to put on a front and make a Spike Lee example out of him. Do the right thing? I think not.

Okay, I know I said that I really want to go and visit New York City, but when something like this comes along, it makes even me question the fate of humanity.

There are thousands of muggings in New York City every year that range from purses being stolen, to 101-year-old ladies getting beat down. In other words; people muggings. Human vs. human. You know what I mean. It’s just a fact that when you live in one of the biggest, craziest cities in the world, you’re going to have some trouble every once in a while. I can accept that.

For Donna McPherson, though, trouble came her way when a mugger stole the coat off of her…dog? WTF NYC? She went into the store for “two minutes” to buy some milk, so she tied up her 10-year-old Westie, Lexie, and when she came back, little Lexie was freezing his pooch off after his green wool coat with leather trim and belt had vanished.

Again, what the hell is wrong with this world? I can see being mugged for your dog, but a dog being mugged for a coat? That’s low, man.

Regardless, I still hope to visit the Big Apple one day. Luckily I’m a cat person, so I don’t expect to run into this problem. They want my wallet? Fine. They can have my eight bucks, but don’t mess with my feline, cause I’ll get medieval on your ass.

It should be noted that in the case of Donna McPherson and Lexie, Verne Troyer is not a suspect. Yet.

(Photo Via: Wpix)

I can’t speak another language, have trouble pronouncing Massachusetts, and am constantly puzzled by Ebonics, but even I can appreciate the news that one of the world’s oldest languages is now extinct, after the last remaining member of a 65,000-year-old tribe has died.

There are roughly 6,000 languages spoken in the world, and about half of them are in danger of going the way of the Dodo, and now we can add the spoken words of the Bo language to that list, after an 85-year old woman named Boa Sr has passed away. Boa was the only one left from the Great Andamanese, a group of tribes that was one of the earliest descendants of human beings. Perhaps the saddest thing is that as she was getting on in years, Boa was going blind, and was unable to speak with anyone in her own language since her husband died a few years ago and she had no children.

Now, not to question the whole point of reproduction or anything, but if I knew I was one of the last members of a 65,000-year-old tribe and had a vagina, I would have did all I could to pro-create. Thanks, Boa, for killing history.

Thankfully, records of the language still exist, and linguists everywhere can have a field day studying it, while Hollywood tries to figure out how they can make a bio-pic of the old woman.

Take a listen. It sounds like something Tolkein created.

(Photo Via: Alok Das)

The world is full of whack jobs. In fact, many of them work right here, at Manolith. As crazy as we are though, nothing beats the theories that make up some of the world’s best conspiracies. From lizard people to JFK to fake moon landings, here are the best of the best that the crazy folks who reside on the internet and in basements around the world would have you believe. In no particular order.

1. JFK Assassination

C’mon, do you really think Lee Harvey Oswald worked all by himself on this one? Back and to the left. Back and to the left. There’s no way Oswald was proficient enough to make the kind of shots they claimed he did with that rifle. No, Kennedy was eliminated by the CIA because he gave away Cuba and wanted to do the same with Vietnam, then started a wave of firings after the Bay of Pigs, which included CIA director Allen Dulles, who was on the Warren Commission. That’s the general consensus, anyway.

2. Hollow Earth

Somewhere deep below us lives a race of beings knows as Agarthians, a race first discovered by Admiral Byrd in 1947 after an expedition to the North Pole. It is said that there are only two openings to the hollow earth, one at the North pole and one at the South pole, and that the U.S. Navy knows of both, but are keeping the information Top Secret. It should also be noted that Byrd was an employee of the Navy when he made two flights into the hollow earth. I wonder if there’s a Dunkin’ Donuts down there?

3.  9/11

Was September 11, 2001 a false flag operation designed to get the U.S. into Iraq? According to many, yes. There’s just too many contradictions when it comes to the ‘evidence’ that 9/11 was carried out solely by a group of terrorists that could barely fly single engine Cessna planes, let alone passenger jets. No remains discovered at the Pentagon or in Pennsylvania, and no black boxes were ever discovered either. How about the reports of bombs going off below the Twin Towers? Building 7 was reported as collapsing by the BBC when clearly it was still standing right behind one of their reporters. What gives, Uncle Sam?

4. The Bilderberg Group

(Image via endevil)

If every single NFL owner met behind closed doors for a weekend and then emerged, refusing to talk about what was discussed, the media would have a field day. Yet, when 120 of the world’s most powerful individuals meet in secret every year, no one says a word. Not only are they breaking the law by defying the Logan Act, but it has been said the group chooses presidents, starts and ends wars, and is in control of the world’s economy, media and government. New World Order? You tell me.

5. Fake Moon Landing

NASA didn’t really go to the moon, based on this theory. Nope, during the height of the space race they lost the first battle to the Russians so they decided to fake a moon landing to appease the American people. Misplaced cross-hairs in photographs, missing transcripts and blueprints from the Apollo mission, misplaced shadows, the absence of stars, and wind blowing the U.S. flag around make up this one, but there is no wind in space, people. Some believe we’ve never been to the moon, and with the cuts Obama just made, it doesn’t look like we’ll be going there anytime soon either.

6. Shape-shifting Lizards Run the World

(Image via urantiunsojourn.com)

At least, according to onetime BBC sports reporter David Icke and his band of followers, they do. Everyone from George W. Bush and the British Royals are really a race of alien beings who came here long ago to colonize the planet. Now they hold some of the highest positions in government, and are controlling everything you do and see in the media. Don’t believe it? Fine, you go offer the former president a plate of flies and see what happens.

7. Free Energy

There’s no way that all we need are oil and gas to run the world. There have been many forms of free energy around for decades, but the corporations that rule oil and gas are snuffing them out, for fear of lost profits. Nikola Tesla was probably the first known victim of this massive cover up. When he discovered it was possible to provide free energy to the world at little cost to the consumer, he was whacked by the FBI.

8. Roswell

On July 8, 1947, a UFO crashed in Rosewell, New Mexico, and ever since then the government has been denying it ever happened. By rewriting documents and airbrushing photographs, the Army and NASA has made most believe aliens don’t even exist. Of course, we all know that’s not true, and that there are E.T.s out there. Some have even landed on earth. Area 51, anyone?

9. The Philadelphia Experiment

In 1943 the U.S. Navy conducted an experiment on the USS Eldridge at the Philadelphia Naval Shipyard, to see if they could render the massive structure invisible. What they ended up doing was tearing a hole in space and time, sending some members of the crew into the future. When the ship rematerialized, there were people stuck in solid steel that could not be freed, and had to be killed. Of course, the Navy denies the experiment ever took place. Surprise, surprise.

10. U.S. Military Caused Indian Ocean Tsunami

Using electromagnetic pulse waves from HAARP, the U.S. government were actually the one’s who caused all the death and destruction brought on by the tsunami. Whether it was in the interest of oil and gas, or just a test to see what effects it would have on the earth — which did include a shift in the North Pole, a change in the rotation of the planet and even a change in the earth’s shape. They’ll never admit to it, of course, but many theorists are looking to Haiti now and wondering what the purpose of that test was.

11. Manufactured Diseases

Everything from AIDS and cancer, to H1N1 and the common cold are under the gun with this one. It’s said the government manufactures these things, then charges the pharmaceutical companies to come up with treatment drugs for them, thus making people a whole lot of money off the suffering of others. Yes, there is a cure for cancer. They just don’t want you to have it because it would cost them too much money.

12. Chemtrails

You know those long trails you see behind jets in the sky? What do you think those are? I’ll tell you: weather modifiers. Yup, the U.S. government has been deep in weather modification for decades, trying to control the earth’s weather in order to further its interests. Just look at Hurricane Katrina. You really think that was a natural disaster? Please, it was an experiment gone wrong on U.S. soil. That’s the theory at least, and they’re sticking to it.

13. Protocols of the Elders of Zion

This book, which surfaced in Russia in 1905, is said to be a map for a small group of Jews to target Christians’ morality, finances and health, in a way that would give them the “in” to world domination. Although it has been purported to be a hoax, the book is still in print today. It was even used by the Nazi’s as an excuse to start their genocide of an entire race of people. Who says you can’t learn anything from books?

14. Princess Diana Murdered

She didn’t die in a car accident. Okay, she did, but it was actually from a hit placed on her by the British Royal Family so that she couldn’t marry a Muslim, or have the child she was carrying in her belly. Yeah, that’s right. She was pregnant. Why would they do this? Because they’re nuts.

15. Global Warming Hoax

The earth’s climate is like a rubber band, stretching and stretching until POP! it snaps back into place. That’s the real reason the world is heating up, and it has nothing to do with Al Gore-made theories. We’re going to have another ice age, believe it or not. Just when and how is up to the earth, not man, to decide. Many corporations and especially the government, are making big bucks off the global warming hoax, and it doesn’t look like it’s going away anytime soon. At least not until 2012, anyway.

NOTE: For the record, I subscribe to some, not all of these theories. Even I don’t think lizard people rule the world — yet.

Oh lord, here we go again. Can’t this woman just keep her mouth shut? Better yet, can’t she just decide on what’s offensive and what isn’t? First she wants the White House Chief of Staff to be fired for calling a group of liberals, “fucking retarded.” Then she dismisses Rush Limbaugh’s use of the word as nothing but satire. Hell, she didn’t even ask Texas Governor Rick Perry to fire his top campaign consultant for using the word. Now she’s taking aim at her own network, FOX, for a recent episode of Family Guy.

On Sunday night, Chris Griffin went on a date with a girl who has Down Syndrome. The fictional girl said that her mother was the former Governor of Alaska and, well, the shit has hit the fan.

Let’s get one thing clear right off the bat. I don’t condone making fun of people with disabilities in public. Behind closed doors, I’ll let the retard jokes fly all I want, okay?

Seriously, though. This is Family Guy we’re talking about. The show that has a history of making fun of every race, creed, color, and inbred hick who ever walked the face of the earth. They’ve been doing it for eight seasons, so why stop now? They’ve aimed their crude humor at politicians before, so why the hell is Sarah Palin getting her panties all in a bunch? Because her son has Down Syndrome? C’mon Palin, loosen up a little, would ya?

Furthermore, how can any “respected” politician make a statement about an incident on Facebook, and expect to not be poked fun at? And having your daughter provide a statement on FB as well? Yeah, that’s smooth, Sarah. Real smooth.

So to recap her position:

Chief of Staff uses the word retard: he should be fired.

Rush Limbaugh uses the word retard: it’s just satire (and Family Guy isn’t?).

Rick Perry and Co. use the word retard: he gets a scolding, but not a call for his job.

Family Guy makes fun of her: THERE WILL BE BLOOD!

Whatever, man. Go back to Alaska. Please.

I don’t have any statistics in front of me for this one, but I bet you there are thousands of men around the United States who are leading double lives right now. You know, married with children, only to go off on weekend “hunting trips” to secretly meet with their gay lovers. They’re hard to spot sometimes, but every once in a while one says something stupid and outs themselves.

Enter Robert Pattinson.

The pasty-face star of the Twilight Saga movies, who plays brooding emo-vampire Edward Cullen, has admitted that he hates vaginas, but really, really, loves his dog. In a recent interview with Details, the 23-year-old actor candidly spoke about the relationship he has with his mutt, admitting that “there might be something wrong with my emotional sight. The only emotional connection of relevance is with my dog. My relationship with my dog, it’s ridiculous.”

If I was Jim Carey, I’d be going “reeeaaallly” right about now.

Pattinson went on to talk about the photo shoot he did for the magazine, where he was positioned between the legs of a hot model for the entire day. He said it made him, “a bit antsy,” and then he dropped this little bomb:

“I really hate vaginas,” he said. “I’m allergic to vagina.”

Sorry ladies, I hate to burst your bubble, but it looks like Edward won’t be visiting your cookie, muffin, ki-ki, or whatever the hell else you women call it, anytime soon. While he may be an okay actor (and I’m being very, very generous here), it looks like he’s happy with his dog for the time being, and steering clear of vaginas. Your vagina included.

Not that there’s anything wrong with that.

Okay, there is, but who am I to judge?

(Photo via: Details)

The man who directed the supposed highest grossing film ever, and who can pretty do much anything he wants at this point in his career–including offing a band of Himalayan immigrants with Nerf light sabers–is not a happy camper.

This time his pent-up frustration is aimed at the Academy of Motion Picture Art and Sciences, who failed to nominate Avatar in the category of acting for this years Oscars. Seriously, James Cameron? The damn thing got nine nominations, including Best Picture, and you’re still not happy?

You spend 15-years making a movie, using groundbreaking CGI technology, release the film with the best 3D technology ever, and you’re upset that the actors didn’t get nominated? What the hell did you think was going to happen? Here’s a newsflash for ‘ya, James: When that much time and effort is spent on the bells and whistles of a film, where you use sophisticated equipment to capture the facial expressions and motions of a human being, and put them up on the big screen all smurf-like, no one gives a shit about the acting. Sam Worthington and Zoe Saldana did not make this film $603 million dollars, the 3D and CGI did.

He says that the Academy is “confused” by the technology of Avatar, and therefore not giving enough credit to the actors of the film. Well, seeing as how Avatar wasn’t nominated for Best Original Screenplay, I’m guessing they didn’t have much to work with there. So it’s no wonder neither of them were nominated.

Oh, one more thing, James. Adjusting for inflation and basing the numbers on actual ticket admissions, Gone With the Wind is still the highest grossing film of all time. (Of! All! Time!) Avatar isn’t even in the top 20.

Put that in your pipe and smoke it, you greedy jackass.

Now they just kill dogs.

After being spooked by fireworks on New Years Eve, 65-year-old Heidi Schwank’s Australian Shepherd, Robby, ran away in Hamburg, Germany. Two days later she gets a call from the police to say that a motorist had hit and killed Robby while he was crossing the street. Poor little guy. Grief stricken Schwank then found out that the cops had lied to her, and that it was actually them that ran down her nine-year-old friend.

Bastards!

Seems that Robby was running amuck on the A1 autobahn, and four officers in two cars spent over an hour slowing down vehicles trying to capture him. When that proved unsuccessful, they got in their cruisers and started playing Frogger, until one of them struck and killed the dog. After a quick high-five, they found that Robby had caused $3,500 worth of damage to the one cruiser, and promptly sent the bill to his owner.

Now, I’m no card carrying member of PETA or anything, but I love animals just as much as the next guy. Running down a dog because you couldn’t capture him? C’mon, Germany. Surely you jest. I mean, the dog was Australian. It’s not like he posed a threat.

Heidi has since hired a lawyer and is out for justice, which she’ll probably get. Hopefully that’ll teach those dirty cops a lesson. Although something tells me that they’ll be out on the streets with a magnifying glass frying ants in no time.

(Image Source)

The co-worker ordered a simple hamburger, but her friend slipped her the cheese, and all hell broke loose. McDonald’s said that she broke the rules which prohibit free gifts to friends, family or colleagues, and fired her ass. Granted, she did break the rules, but fired over a piece of cheese? C’mon.

“A written warning would have been a more appropriate punishment,” said the court who heard the case. “It is just a slice of cheese.”

Yeah, no kidding.

They sided with the employee who sued, and ordered Big Ron to pay her for the remaining five months of her contract. $6,006.69 bucks. Do the math, and you’ll see that she made about $14,500 a year. I don’t know whether to laugh or cry over that.

Now, I’m not sure if the employee who gave the piece of cheese did so with malicious intent or not, and if so, that would make the case all the more serious, and yes, justify a termination. A single slice of McDonald’s cheese has 3.5 grams of fat, 15 mg of cholesterol and 50 calories. It’s possible she was trying to put the slow hurt on her co-worker in order to secure her position sometime over the next ten years. I guess now we’ll never know. Quick, someone call Unsolved Mysteries.

The news comes just days after McDonald’s reported an increase in net profits by almost 25% in the last three months of 2009.

(Image Source)

So does Yang, an old guy from Shanghai. After his wife died and his son left to pursue his studies, Yang was one lonely dude. With the need to get off every once in a while, he purchased a blow-up doll in hopes of gaining some companionship. I guess his arthritic hands just weren’t cutting it. Yang and his doll lived the good life, frolicking behind closed doors till all hours of the night, giggling and laughing about all the things they just did. Okay, Yang was the only one giggling, but that’s besides the point. Yeah, they had it real good, until the Internet ruined everything.

Yang was perusing an online forum one day, and saw all the negative comments folks were leaving about others who owned blow-up dolls. They called them losers and creeps and people who were fucked up in the head. Poor Yang. He took it personally and cried for days. Too shamed to go on, he decided to kill himself.

The old Asian went out onto his sixth floor balcony with his doll, said good-bye to this cruel world, and jumped! Onlookers were in shock, since they thought he was holding a little girl. They shielded their eyes as Yang hit the ground and a large BANG was heard, which they assumed was Yang’s insides splattered all over the sidewalk.

Nope, it was his blow-up doll.

Yang’s love-you-longtime gal broke his fall, thus saving his life. Yang was knocked unconscious, but eventually made a full recovery at a nearby hospital.

Ladies, can you believe this guy is single?

While the men duke it out on the field, corporations will be in a grudge match of their own, as they spend millions of dollars on the commercials that will hopefully garner enough attention to become part of pop culture, and make you buy their products. It’s a tough job, creating a memorable commercial, but I’ve managed to weed out the crap to present to you the five best Super Bowl commercials of all-time.

5. We Will Rock You

Starring Pink, Britney Spears, Beyonce and Enrique Iglesias, this wasn’t so much of a commercial as it was a full-blown production for Pepsi. The girls did a good job belting out the classic by Queen, showing lots of skin, in what is a 3 minute feast for the eyes and the ears.

4. Miller Lite Cat Fight

Girls clawing, girls scratching, girls ripping each others clothes off, and yes, girls kissing. What more do you want?

3. WAZZUP

Budweiser nailed a field goal with this one, as the word ‘Wazzup’ became a part of the language. Mimicked in Scary Movie, and still used by frat boys and office geeks to this day, this one did everything a commercial is supposed to do. Make people talk.

2. Office Linebacker

This first in a series of Reebok commercials starred NFL wannabe, Lester Speight, as ‘Terrible’ Terry Tate, a linebacker with attitude who is brought on board to help a company with their productivity. Yikes! Someone remind me to use paper clips and not staples, please.

1. Apple’s 1984

The one that started it all. The one that introduced Macintosh to the world. Forget everything you know about advertising as you watch this masterpiece that was directed by Ridley (Alien, Blade Runner, ) Scott.

If New York City took a shit, you’d get Toronto, Canada, and while I’ve never been to NYC, I have lived in its poop for the past seven years and traveled the subways on a daily basis. I’ve seen a lot of crazy stuff, but nothing, and I mean nothing, beats this one from the Big Apple.

I should note that I love chicken. Fried chicken, grilled chicken, chicken and waffles, stuffed chicken and chicken with a biscuit — I love it all. I don’t love it enough, though, to play with one on the subway like this dude. Seriously, kissing and hugging your chicken on the subway? While it’s still clucking! WTF?

Kylie Kaiser, an architect from Brooklyn, shot this footage of a man on the No. 6 train at 33rd Street station, who was frolicking with his bird in front of passengers who were too shocked to do or say anything. Imagine, you get on the train to go to work and there he is, rolling around on the floor with a chicken. A freakin’ chicken, man! What’s crazy, is that his feathered friend seemed to like it. Notice how he lets go of his bird for a few moments and it just sits there, chilling out on his chest. That’s one obedient cock.

A transit spokesman said that no one reported the incident, and that only service animals and those in containers are permitted on the subway system. So yeah, they’re looking into it.

Perhaps even more intriguing, is that Fashion Indie is reporting that this ‘guy’ was actually a woman, acting out a scene from her favorite movie, Borat. Double WTF? Whose favorite movie if Borat? I give up.

It’s stuff like this that makes me want to go to New York City. While I’ve never seen anything like chicken man on the Toronto transit system, I did see an Asian guy looking at his reflection once, and yelling, “WAZZUP!” for 45-minutes.

Somehow that doesn’t compare.

I can’t believe I’m going to use “hot” and “PETA” in the same sentence, but holy crap, this PETA video is hot. Who the hell needs Obama when you have this?

In anticipation of the presidents first State of the Union address, PETA came up with this little gem to continue their fight for awareness over cruelty to animals. Featuring a woman who strips down to her birthday suit, and footage from Congress — including cuts to 83-year-old Congressman John Dingell and a nod from First Lady Michelle Obama. How awesome is that?

Normally I stay away from anything PETA does because, frankly, I like a big ol’ hunk of meat just as much as the next man, and I don’t care how the cow died for me to get it. They need to do more videos like this, though, to get someone like myself interested in their cause. While it may not make me stop chowing down a steak with my eggs, it’ll definitely make me stand at attention (in more ways than one), and perhaps share it with my friends on Facebook or Twitter. Yeah, I’m a pig. I admit it, and if it takes a naked woman for me to start caring about something, then so be it.

Well done, PETA. Well done.

President Barack Obama will be delivering his first ever State of the Union address tonight at 9/8 Central, and if you’re one of the few people in America who doesn’t have cable, satellite, a radio, or if you’ve been banned from The Rusty Nail in a Bikini tavern down the street, have no fear. Manolith has got you covered.

Thanks to the miracle of the Internet and embedded codes, you’re going to want to be here tonight to watch it live as it happens. Obama’s under more pressure than Jack Bauer right now, so this is his chance to shine. We’ll see how he delivers on all the issues, including health care reform, the economy as it relates to job creation, and of course, tax breaks for the middle class.

His presidency may be under fire, but this is a chance for Obama to start fresh, and win back the voters who may have turned on him after not being satisfied with his first year in office. No one said it would be easy being president, and I’m sure Obama knows that, but something’s gotta give tonight, or else it will be the biggest backlash you’ve ever seen.

It’s time for the president to cowboy up, boys and girls. Will he do it? Find out tonight at 9/8 Central (6pm Pacific) right here on Manolith.

Unfortunately, a guy in Marlborough, New Hampshire, was not as lucky as I. He called up a hooker (sorry, prostitute) and her friend, paid them $150 bucks to both have sex with him, and then they refused. What a pity.

Police are now investigating the case, where the hooker (damn, I mean prostitute), 22, and the man, 32, have been cited in court. They’re apparently still looking for the third woman in this triangle of love.

Now, see, this is what’s wrong with America today. Customer service is going straight down the drain. I don’t know about you, but when I pay for something, I see that as a binding contract, and expect the other party to deliver. Who the hell does this woman think she is? Not following through on sex? C’mon. $150 bucks is nothing to sneeze at in today’s economy. It would at least pay for the abortion if the condom broke.

I admit that this guy might not be the freshest egg in the carton, since he got so pissed off that he called the police on the hooker (why do I keep doing that?), which is how he got himself into this whole mess, but still. It’s not like there’s a head office he can contact, and no, her pimp doesn’t count.

America, wake up! We deserve better. From our retail stores, to our doctors, to the hooker (last time, I swear) on the street corner. The customer is always right!

Side note: What the hell is Marlborough doing with hookers, anyway?

While the Knicks were on the road a couple of weeks ago, several of the players claimed to have felt ghosts in their hotel, thus causing them to blow their January 11 game against the Oklahoma City Thunder by 18 points. Now, I’m all for the paranormal, but blaming the loss on the spirits? Man, that’s low. It was probably just Kevin Durant looking for an ice bucket.

For two days, a bunch of the players claimed to have trouble sleeping because they believed that their downtown hotel, the Skirvin Hilton, was haunted. Eddy Curry said that he only slept for two hours Sunday night because he couldn’t stop thinking about ghosts roaming the halls.

“I definitely believe it,” Jared Jeffries said. “The place is haunted. It’s scary.”

Legend has it that a woman in the 1930s jumped to her death while holding her baby in her arms. Other guests have been reporting strange noises and sightings for years, but as far as I know, this is the first time a professional sports team has used the excuse.

“They said it happened on the 10th floor and I’m the only one staying on the 10th floor,” Curry said. “That’s why I spent most of my time in Nate Robinson’s room. I definitely believe there are ghosts in that hotel.” Yeah, that’s why, Eddy.

Assistant Coach Herb Williams, who I guess had no trouble getting some Z’s, teased Jeffries and Curry for believing in ghosts, but the players were having none of that.

“There are too many stories,” Curry said. “Something is going on there.”

It should be noted that Jeffries and Curry are 10th and 12th on the team’s PPG average, and are currently in talks to appear in Ghostbusters 3. Okay, I made that last part up.

The famous duo of Cheech & Chong would want to smoke up with her, too, and Politico caught their admission of guilt all on tape. The pair were at the Marijuana Policy Project’s 15th Anniversary Gala (how did I miss that?), when a reporter asked them who the one politician is that they’d want to smoke up with. Cheech immediately answered, “Sarah Palin,” thinking that she grows the stuff herself in her backyard in Alaska. That wouldn’t surprise me one bit, since she’s always got that glassy look in her eyes.

“She answers a lot of questions like a stoner,” added Chong, and on that I have to agree. She may be able to see Russia from her front porch, but to not be able to find North Korea? C’mon, you know she’s smoking the ganja.

Palin recently joined the team at FOX News, so this video is perfect timing. With Palin going national very soon, expect her to be the butt of many more jokes like this, because while she may have a nice ass, it looks even better when it’s being made fun of.

Have you ever wondered who exactly used their bath pillow as a flotation device. You know someone did, or else why would they put the warning on it in the first place? Or are only stupid people buying bath pillows? It took some time, a lot of products were examined, but I have managed to come up with a list of the ten best (or worst) warning labels in the history of consumerism.

10. Caution: Do not spray in eyes.

Found on a can of deodorant. Cause you know, nothing attracts the ladies like fresh smelling pupils

9. Warning: Has been found to cause cancer in laboratory mice.

Found on a box of rat poison. I guess since it’s only supposed to be used on rats, that one was needed.

8. Not dishwasher safe.

Found on a TV remote. In case your remote gets all greasy while eating pork rinds?

7. Remove child before folding.

Found on a baby stroller. Nothing says child services like junior with a broken spine.

6. Do not eat toner.

Found on a cartridge for a laser printer. Did someone try and print their intestines?

5. Never iron clothes while they are being worn.

Found on household irons. You know someone showed up at the hospital with third-degree burns over that one.

4. For use on animals only.

Found on an electric cattle prod. So much for sticking it to The Man.

3. Not for human consumption.

Found on a package of dice. C’mon seven! Daddy needs a new stomach lining.

2. Warning: This spray is harmful to bees.

Found on a can of insecticide. What the hell did they think you were going to use it for?

1. Please keep out of children.

Found on a butcher knife. I guess sticking it in the eye of an adult is okay.

There you have it. The top 10 warning labels of all time. What? You think you can do better? Put your best of the best below and we’ll see.

It all started when London’s News of the World reported that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie were calling it quits. The internet has been buzzing with the news all weekend, and now TMZ has the scoop that according to one trusted source, it’s all bullshit.

Today’s lesson: Never trust a Brit.

The couple reportedly started dividing up their assets after signing separation papers earlier this month. With an estimated fortune of $330 million, which includes estates in France, New Orleans and Los Angeles, they would have faced the challenge of moving on with their lives. Sadly, that’s not the case, but Haitian children can now breathe a sigh of relief, as I’m sure the couple are already stocking up on baby Dolce and Gabbana wear. This whole thing comes after months of speculation that the relationship was over, after various news media reported that the couple were seen fighting in public over where they would score their next tax shelter. Sorry, I mean child.

Okay, I’m done. Who the hell cares?

Angelina Jolie hasn’t done a decent movie since, well, ever, and Pitt looks like he’s growing Cthulhu on his face these days. I hated Inglourious Basterds, could care less about the public image charity work, and man oh man, I’m still pissed over that whole Jennifer Aniston thing. Forget Team Coco, Team Edward, and Team America. I was Team Aniston all the way, baby!

Just when it looked like we could say good riddance to bad celebrity name combination’s forever, we’re stuck with Brangelina for a little while longer.

Sorry, Madonna. Back of the line!

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Federal agents have arrested a Colorado man for slapping pictures of Tiger Woods and his wife on Tropical-Mango Gatorade bottles, and placing them on store shelves. Now really, who cares about Tiger Woods anymore? I’m just excited to find out that there’s a flavor of Gatorade called Tropical-Mango. Usually I just drink the blue one, so this is awesome.

Apparently the guy, Jason Eric Kay, 38, told agents that he considered his altered sports drink bottles, which he called Unfaithful, to be akin to Andy Warhol art. They on the other hand, consider his art to be more akin of several felonies. Like misbranding and altering food products. Damn. I guess I can toss out all those Jay Leno labels I was going to put on Pampers.

While the FDA and PepsiCo were investigating who was doing this heinous act, Kay actually had the balls to send them a letter, offering to go on tour to place his altered products in different cities, but only if Pepsi would pay for his travel. I guess you can’t feel too sorry for the guy then, considering he was dumb enough to offer such a request without asking for a meal allowance.

Kay now risks a sentence of up to three years in prison and a fine of $250,000 for placing 67 labeled Tropical-Mango Gatorade bottles on store shelves. While I think that’s a little much, I do think Kay deserves some kind of punishment. Maybe they should just force him to watch 67 hours of Sarah Palin on FOX.

Powerade, take note: this is why Gatorade rules.

Calling all alcoholics in Tacoma, Washington. Here’s your chance to get drunk and help a good cause at the same time. Who would have thought drunks were good for anything except comic relief and midnight beatings?

A blood clinic in Washington state is holding its “Give blood, get beer” promotion, and it’s been working so well that they’re expanding it even further.

So here’s the deal: You have to be 21, give a pint of blood, and BAM! You could be sauced by 2pm with a coupon for a free pint of beer. There’s no word on how many times you can donate, so if you’re lucky and have a few fake mustaches and beards lying around the house, you may never be sober again.

The Cascade Regional Blood Services director of donor resources (try saying that 5 times fast), Dan Schmitt, says, “it’s a fun way to get more donors, and it’s good for participating businesses as well.”

Apparently,  pubs and restaurants taking part in the promotion have to wait at least four hours after the blood drive ends before honoring the coupons, so they’re probably time stamped, or some nonsense like that. However, if you’re handy with a printer, there are ways around that little problem.

The Swiss Pub in downtown Tacoma was the first pub to participate in the promotion, and co-owner Jack McQuade says, “It was just a great opportunity for our customers and the people who work around here to make it real easy to give blood.” He went on to say that, “people don’t give blood simply to get a beer.”

Yeah. Keep dreaming, Jack.

Now while I don’t advocate alcoholism, I do advocate alcohol. I’m not saying you should go out and get all Lestat on your body just to get shit-faced, but hey, if it’s state approved, then why the hell not? I mean, even MADD (Mothers Against Drunk Driving) don’t see a problem with it, so long as the clinic abides with the Washington State Liquor Control Board regulations and doesn’t give tickets to those under 21. Because you know, no one over 21 ever killed anyone while drunk driving.

(Photo Via: Prometheus)

The 4,370-berth docked at the resort of Labadee on Friday, with heavily armed guards patrolling 12-foot high fences, so passengers could get off and “cut loose” on the beaches with water sports, barbecues, and shopping. Are you kidding me? People are dead, missing, severely injured, homes are ruined, loved ones are lost just miles away and these guys are off on jet skis having a gay ol’ time? This is what’s wrong with the world, people.

Trying to make up for this blunder, Royal Caribbean said that the ship was carrying some food aid for the Haitians, and that one hundred percent of the proceeds from the visit would go to help the stricken people of Haiti. Sorry, guys, that’s just not cutting it for me. There’s a little thing called tact. How about just canceling the damn cruise? What? You don’t think the passengers would understand? Again, I repeat: this is what’s wrong with the world, because I guarantee that half of those people would be about as pissed off as I am right now if their vacation got shut down.

Screw you, Royal Caribbean. You just won the Most Disgusting Corporation of the Year award, and it’s only January. Bravo.

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