You’ve tried online dating. You’ve tried the bar scene. You’ve tried Axe Body Spray.
Still can’t find that special girl who will make you feel loved? You might have gone overboard on the body spray.
But worry not. A team of Japanese engineering students can relate to your struggle. And they’ve invented the solution.
The students at the University of Tsukuba pooled their collective brainpower and loneliness to create the Riajyuu Coat — a “fulfillment coat” that hugs you and whispers sweet nothings into your ear.
“This makes the feeling that it is like girlfriend hugs,” explains software engineer Kota Shinbayashi, via subtitles.
Only. In. Japan.
According to Japanese news site rocket24.com, motors on back of the jacket operate the “arms,” which are synced to an audio track controlled by a computer via USB connection.
When you’re feeling blue, the jacket will give you a squeeze and say phrases (in that impossibly squeaky, ultra-cutesy tone typically heard in anime) like “I’m sorry, were you waiting?” and “Guess who!”
To clarify: it’s totally effed up.
Maybe just cut down on the body spray and lower your standards.