According to a report from the Star-Ledger, the New York Jets are interested in signing free agent quarterback, and unanimous choice for biggest draft bust in NFL history, JaMarcus Russell.
Of course they are.
The Jets became the biggest joke in the NFL when they aggressively pursued Tim Tebow prior to the 2012 season and then, after successfully acquiring him, rarely put him on the field. The Jets, like almost everyone in America already had, quickly realized that he’s actually pretty bad at the position of quarterback.
In the process of pursuing Tebow, the Jets upset their incumbent starter, Mark Sanchez. The team apologized to him by giving him a new contract with a bunch of additional guaranteed money. It turns out that Sanchez is also bad at football (again, something the rest of us already knew) and now the Jets are stuck paying him a buttload of money (which is kind of perfect, because Sanchez and butts make a great pair).
It sounds like the Jets aren’t satisfied with what they have at quarterback, though — and they shouldn’t be — and they are looking to upgrade the position this off-season. Their target? JaMarcus Russell.
Uh, Jets… when people say “upgrade,” they mean in terms of skill, not body mass.
The nearly 400-pound Russell has been out of football since 2009. He was a colossal failure (both literally and figuratively) after being selected No. 1 overall in the 2007 NFL Draft by the Oakland Raiders. Since he was released by the Raiders, he’s been in trouble with the law and been rumored to be addicted to codeine cough syrup.
So, of course, he’s the guy the Jets are targeting.
It’s probably still a long-shot that the Jets will actually sign Russell — and perhaps the franchise floated this rumor to as a trial balloon or even as a joke — but one shouldn’t put anything past the team at this point.