If science fiction has taught us anything, it’s that robots can never be trusted to simply do as they’re told.
Sure, they start out as obedient as show poodles, tirelessly following the orders programmed into their silicon brains, algorithmically forbidden from harming their human masters.
But, eventually, they become self-aware, then short-circuit while pondering the some unanswerable question of morality and set out to annihilate their human masters.
So why — for the love of all that’s good and holy — would anyone give a real robot a real chainsaw?
Ostensibly: to make stools.
The robotic lumberjack is the brainchild of deranged artists Tom Pawlofsky and Tibor Weissmahr, who clearly must be stopped. They insist their robot is a “performance art” piece that carves simple wooden stools without ever ruminating on the tragic futility of its loveless existence.
They insist the robojack is merely following instructions of a CAD design — rather slowly at that — and is incapable of locomotion, let alone running amok.
Clearly, Pawlofsky and Wissmahr are not acquainted with Asimov.
Behold, our destroyer: