Every once in a while, you hear about a weird potato chip flavor that can be found in another country. Canada has ketchup chips. England has Worcester sauce and roast chicken chips. In part of Asia, they have garlic soft-shelled crab and hot chili squid chips. Stuff gets pretty crazy–but it stays within the rules.
There’s an unwritten rule that chip flavors have to stay on the savory side of things. Chips are supposed to be salty, not sweet. You eat them as a snack or a side dish, not as dessert. We all know and accept this. Universal truths like this are what allows our society to remain intact. They raise us from chaos and separate us from the animals.
The maniacs over at Pringles just blew that unwritten rule apart.
They just announced a flavor of chip that is either going to go down as the most important flavor since salt and vinegar–a flavor single-handedly capable of changing the entire chip industry. O, it could go down as the flavor that ends civilization as we know it.
There are now white chocolate peppermint Pringles. They are a thing that exists in our plane of reality.
If that news wasn’t enough to shock you to your core, there are also two other flavors of sweet Pringles: cinnamon and sugar, and pumpkin pie spice.
“We wanted to explore unique flavor offerings, while remaining loyal to the savory flavor varieties our fans know and love,” the associate marketing director for Pringles told Today.com.
Did you not consider the potential ramifications of your actions? It’s one thing to be curious and do some exploring, it’s quite another to meddle in affairs that should not be meddled in!
The brave few humans who have volunteered to test these new flavors aren’t exactly gushing about the experience. The Huffington Post’s food section called the white chocolate peppermint Pringles a “horrible abomination to humanity” and insisted that such a description is “not an exaggeration.” Words like toothpaste and mouthwash have been used to describe the flavor.
The other two flavors received slightly better reviews, though few of the brave taste-testers were able to swallow more than a single chip.
The three new Pringles flavors will be on sale of a limited time this holiday season, beginning in early November, so you still have a few days to get down to your bomb shelter and await the end of civilization.