Good news, gentlemen. If you like your blondes to be irritable, drunk, and possessing their own television shows, your demi-god has been set loose to pasture to find the next available rich man to scoop into her folds. Chelsea Handler is single.
Which is surprising to no-one, considering Chelsea Handler’s track record of being an insufferable, vaguely racist and irritating blonde. For those of you keeping score at home, Chelsea was at one point dating the president of the network where she was able to score her shows – which might explain why her media presence is stretched out and interminable. She was dating hotelier Andres Balasz, owner of such storied properties as the Chateau Marmont, the Boom Boom Room, and several others. Before, she was seen gallivanting around town with rap luminary and now energy-drink mogul 50 Cent. The only requirement to be dating Chelsea Handler apparently, is fat pockets and an eighty-pound bag worth of patience.
What else do you need to date Chelsea Handler? If the stories of her being trashed on tour and her writer’s room are any indication, a lot of vodka would help.
So wrangle up some Grey Goose, get on a fancy suit, and start patrolling the events in Hollywood.
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