Get Laid or Die Trying Book Giveaway Winners!

Jeff Allen is a dating coach for Real Social Dynamics, the world’s largest dating coaching company, but he used to be clueless about picking up women. Finally disgusted with relationships after repeatedly getting burned, Jeff decides to divorce all emotion from them and go on a hedonistic sex-romp.  He details his 5 year-long, utterly shameless, and insanely successful quest to seduce as many women as humanly possible in his new book, GET LAID OR DIE TRYING: The Field Reports, on sale now.  Below is an excerpt. And two lucky winners will win a copy!  

Someone is sleeping next to me, and I struggle to determine who it is.  It appears to be an unattractive woman with an extraordinary bad haircut. I’m not sure, but I think it’s my sister’s friend. I vaguely remember having sex with her at some point.  Her mouth is open, and she’s snoring loudly.  I need to get the fuck out of here as quickly as possible.

I manage to stand and begin to look for my clothing.  I find my tracksuit on the floor next to the bed. It is covered in chunky vomit, the source of the stench. Flashes of dinner at the sushi bar. I don’t want to wear these clothes, but it looks like I have no choice.  I shake the chucks off and pull on the pants, slip into my shoes and tiptoe out of the apartment.

………..

Before last night’s debacle I had slept with only two women in my lifetime. In both instances, I had given myself 100 percent to the relationship, heart and soul, expecting the same in return.  Both times, that intensity was reciprocated for a while, but it did not last. It couldn’t. Suddenly, it becomes clear that I’ve been trying to operate within a framework that’s inherently flawed. Right here, in this freezing garage at seven o’clock in the morning, I arrive at a decision:

I am going to become a “player.”

I chuckle to myself at how ridiculous it sounds. It’s a concept that up until this very  moment I would not have regarded as anything but a fantasy. A fictional lifestyle from a Too $hort rap. But the more I think about it, the more I warm to the idea.  Divorce all emotion from my sexual relationships. Go on a hedonistic fuck-spree and rail a shit-ton of hot bitches; a sort of “salvation through sin.” Abandon the ridiculous notion of true love and all of its attendant bullshit. I just don’t care anymore. No more feelings. This is war: Date. Fuck. Win.

This week we’re giving away Get Laid or Die Trying to TWO Lucky Manolith Readers:

And the winners are..

JR

Carol Sue

Congrats!  Check your email for more info on claiming your prize.

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One Response to Get Laid or Die Trying Book Giveaway Winners!

  1. Hooray! I really needed this – hahaha. 🙂