Is the internet creating more filthy, godless harlots, running around sacrificing goats and chanting in Latin? The church says yes.
The church says a lot of goofy things though, from the papal ban of joyous dancing, to the great puppy exclusion of the oughties. Whenever there’s progress in the realm of humanity that we can embrace and really be proud of, someone in robes and a silly hat will come in and tickle it until it leaves the room embarrassed. And now? Instead of focusing on the inner problems in infrastructure (read: there’s a man in the back with an underage boy), they’re blaming the internet for a rise in Satanism. That’s right – the internet. Because if there’s something that people who regularly troll the internet are experts in, it’s deviant behavior.
Really? Is Satan that desperate that he wants to hang out with a bunch of people who access LOLCats? Is that his place in the contemporary world? We don’t really need to worry about that. If Satan started making YouTube videos, he couldn’t get enough of an audience to rival Freddie W.
But the Vatican’s chief exorcist was claiming that the devil was lurking in the head of the church. Personally, I’m more interested that there’s still a chief exorcist of the Vatican. I would love to hear him explain his job in a bar.
“What is it you do?”
“I get paid money to fight with Satan.”
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