Man Tries to Feed Bears While Stoned – Awarded Workers’ Comp

By James Sheldon on March 25th, 2011

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It helps to read this post with America, The Beautiful playing in the background.

So this happened back in 2007. Brock Hopkins, a park worker–and I use the term “park worker” loosely; he was more of an occasionally paid volunteer–at Great Bear Adventure in Montana, was mauled after entering a bear enclosure to feed the animals. Apparently, he didn’t check with the bears about his personage being on the menu that afternoon.

Here’s the catch: Before he entered the enclosure, Mr. Hopkins decided he’d smoke a joint. Well, at least he admitted to smoking a joint before feeding the bears, but who’s to say how large it was, you know? I have a feeling he laced his joint with a little jackass, and had a sip of peppermint schmuck before entering the caged area as well.

One of the park favorites, a grizzly bear named Red, didn’t take kindly to Brock’s presence, and put the smack down. Rumors swirled that Red, the bear, yelled various derogatory remarks at Hopkins, including, “I told you not to come back in here high! I’ve done told you a’hunnerd times I don’t want that dope around my kids… …what did I say I would do the next time you brought that sh*t around my kids? What did I say? No! No! What did I say!? Now you’re gonna pay, you sonofab****!!!”

Fast forward to present, and The Montana Supreme Court has ruled that Russ Kilpatrick, the owner of Great Bear Adventure, owes Mr. Hopkins Workers’ Compensation benefits for the injuries he sustained from getting slapped around by a grizzly. This, even after Kilpatrick stated that Hopkins isn’t even really an employee. The Supreme court disagreed and stated that Hopkins’ state of mind was of no consequence, due to the fact that grizzlies are “equal-opportunity maulers.”