Teen Burglars Snort Human & Dog Ashes – Oye.

In Silver Springs Shores, Florida three men and two teens were arrested on suspicion of breaking into a Florida home and stealing electronics and jewelry. The story would not have caught Manolith’s eye if it weren’t for the sad, sad events that followed.

Among several items missing, the woman listed the ashes of her two great danes and father.

Apparently, the burglers found it in the house, stole them and proceed to.. snort them.

Oh yes — I’m serious. They apparently thought the urns were filled with cocaine.

Somehow Waldo Soroa, 19, Matrix Andaluz, 18 and Jose David Diaz Marrero, 19 walked into a house persumably lived in by a family with children and thought that the urns in the book cases and closet were large tubs of cocaine. Imagine how proad of themselves they were – thinking they just hit the cocaine motherload?

When they didn’t get high they threw the ashes in a lake — the Marion County Sherrif’s Office dive team was able to locate them and return them to the family. Of course they could have just left it at that, but no, these fools admitted their mixup to the police after being picked up.  

Soroa faces seven charges and has a bond of $17k. Andaluz faces six charges with a bond of $11.5k and Marrero faces four with a bond at $9k. Can someone give these guys a grant for schooling? I’m worried that they might procreate children who eat glue and smoke oregano for the “high”.

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