NOOOOOO POOR TAYLOR.
It’s unbelievable the amount of tail that John Mayer — douchebag extraordinaire has been able to score. Despite saying things like he has a racist penis and playing the most benign music possible.
From Hollywood’s most prominent and eligible bachelor-cougars to young starlets, to now apparently TAYLOR SWIFT? Really? Taylor Swift, I hope you enjoy your delicious herpes. Seriously – you’re going from country’s darling to an annoying clingy weirdo who writes songs about famous people. First Kanye, then John Mayer, you’re like a walking diary of songs all written in C-Major about people who have slighted you. Despite being famous. And having untold millions of dollars. Taylor Swift did a guest spot on Mayer’s album Battle Studies, and if you’re in the know, guest spot means excuse to hit on. So apparently Mayer and Swift got romantically entangled — she got hurt. He probably celebrated the fact that his celebrity gives him access to the dumbest tail to stab, and she wrote a song about it.
‘Dear John/I see it all now that you’re gone/Don’t you think I was too young/To be messed with/The girl in the dress/Cried the whole way home/I should’ve known.’
*lights cigarette*, *exhales*
Everybody, snap. That is poetry. This and more can be found the bound-volume set, ‘Tales Of Boring People Fucking’.
Comments
No comments.