It was inevitable. It was a long time coming. It was painfully obvious to anybody who watched gremlin-faced famewhorer Tila Tequila that her calling wasn’t in fact MySpace modeling – it was pornography.
And now that day of reckoning has finally come – ordained since time immemorial. Tila Tequila is making the transition to porn star – to the tunes of millions of dollars. Wait a minute, somebody thinks that a Tila Tequila sextape is worth millions of dollars? This does not compute. I doubt 500,000 people would buy a Tila Tequila sextape even if you sold it for the basement price of two dollars – they could just recreate the experience with a plush toy of a Gremlin from the hit 80’s film and a sex toy. Just shimmy a hole in the bottom of the gremlin, violate it, and if you want to add super-realism, tattoo the Gremlin toy while it’s happening. With something flowery.
Tila spent her earnings on a brand new blue Lamborghini. Which will be undoubtedly repossessed after her drug habits consume her.
Most recently, Tequila was in the news for being romantically involved with Casey Johnson, notable heiress trainwreck and strung-out wunderkind.
1 million dollars to see Tila Tequila have sex? What is this, 2003?
