If you see a streaking redhead hightailing it down Rodeo or Robertson, chances are you won’t be surprised as to who it is. Lindsay Lohan has been released from her prison.
Not from her prison of insanity and drug use, though, that’s the next step to come, hopefully. Lindsay is moving to the UCLA neuropsychiatric hospital, to be treated for a rumored addiction to meth and bipolar disorder – and I SMELL A SITCOM. Hopefully she can clash with her wacky doctors who are always chasing the spotlight and recommending her to partake in bizarre courses of action for her treatment. Like making public appearances in deserted nightclubs in Schaumburg, Illinois or starting a charity drive for afflicted child stars. And Jesus Christ, bipolar disorder and meth? That’s the world’s deadliest combination, next to pork chops and whipped cream.
Bipolar disorder must be much worse when you’re on meth – that should be an entirely new disorder called ‘Burnt Trailer Park Disorder’. And BTPD should be listed in the DSM.
Lohan served only 13 days of her 90-day sentence, and was let out supposedly because of overcrowding and good behavior, but all reports of her behavior indicate that she was wailing too much at night.
So I hope you enjoy wailing, citizens of Westwood. You’re about to hear a lot of it. Along with a lot of paparazzi and underwear.
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