Woman Claims To Be Michael Jackson’s Lovechild

By Mark Lorenz on July 27th, 2010

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Michael Jackson’s children are coming out of the woodwork. And no, not those children. Not the ones he liked to keep in little compounds on his property.

His actual, real-life children. If the people who have come to the media are to be believed, there’s at least dozens of them. And none of them have been mothered by any sort of woman with a name resembling Billie Jean. But the daughter of Diana Ross’ sister is claiming that Michael Jackson impregnated her mother way back in 1975. The result was a lovechild, never meant to be. Lovechild, born in poverty. A lovechild, take a look at *gunshot*. Nobody likes puns.

The result was a lady named Mocienne Petit Jackson, who recently filed documents with L.A. County Superior Court, claiming that she was the result of a liaison between Michael Jackson and Diana Ross’ sister, and that she’s due for a major slice of the Jackson inheritance.

Also part of the claim? That Katherine Jackson hatched a plan to abduct her, and all 7 of her alleged abductors were eventually murdered. MPJ currently lives in the Netherlands, where I’m sure tons of drugs help her think about Michael Jackson in the most lucid states possible. She also wants custody of Michael Jackson’s kids.

Cray-cray.