Glenn Beck To Start A UNIVERSITY?!

Well, now I’ve heard everything. Literally everything. Nobody make any more sounds, because my head won’t be able to process the insanity of Glenn Beck starting up his own college.

Colleges are pretty much a giant pyramid scheme, with recent graduates out of work in droves and the money they charge for tuition increasingly steadily, you might be better off investing in a library card. Or being a whore-in-a-box. Because that might pay you more than a college degree.

So I can imagine someone looking up at the night sky, shouting angrily for a talking-head pundit from television to come in and save the education system as we know it – and like the paragon of insanity we know him to be, Glenn Beck has answered the call. So just in time for summer school, he’s announced that he’s starting a university in his name. Enjoy their mission statement.

Beck University is a unique academic experience bringing together experts in the fields of religion, American history and economics. Through captivating lectures and interactive online discussions, these experts will explore the concepts of Faith, Hope and Charity and show you how they influence America’s past, her present and most importantly her future.

It’s funny. Beck University? That degree would be more useless than a one-legged diabetic during the zombie apocalypse. I find it interesting that on their mission statement, they’ve also neglected the concept of eating tubes of cookie-dough then saying vaguely racist things to garner a large audience share. That’s a founding principle of Beck University and their rivals, Fascist SU and Hamburger College.

Leave a Reply



Comments are closed.