Rarely do machines come out that are hailed as the next phase in the evolution of technology. The car. The first computer. iCarly. But some machines are so revolutionary that they demand to be acknowledged as exactly that. The iPad is one of those machines.
The ipad can function as a book, be used for video, email, photos, maps, phone, music, calendar, and so much more. Steve Jobs has touted the iPad as, “being really, really super,” and more applications and features are coming out for it every day. But the iPad can’t do everything, yet. Here below is a list of just some of the things the Apple has planned for the next iteration of the iPad to be able to do:
1. Babysit.
2. Keep Tim Burton from making new movies.
3. Love.
4. Act the fool.
5. Roll around in the sand with you, laughing and kissing.
6. Bake fresh bread.
7. Get drunk and keep referring to you sarcastically as “Big Man On Campus”.
8. Smirk when you accidentally refer to “Milanos” as “Mulattos” in front of the black guy who works the counter at the Ralphs.
9. Perceive the relative frailty of all living things.
10. Be passive aggressive when you ask it who left the toilet seat up last night.
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