He might be crazy. He might love to live dangerously. But he will kickbox the hell out of your head. Repeatedly. That’s what Jean-Claude Van Damme does, son. Your head is an obstacle that he’s going to remove. Whether your head wants it, or not.
That’s what he’s vowed to do, at least, in a fight. Jean-Claude Van Damme will not kick your head away from your body if you make the entirely common mistake of asking him for directions. Not since he did that to the last five.
JCVD feels like he’s still up to the task of handing people’s asses to them, so he’s going to train up to fight a professional, Olympic medal winning Muay Thai fighter. I’ll repeat that. 50-year-old Jean-Claude Van Damme, a Gucci-sunglasses wearing action cliché, is going to fight a professional Muay Thai fighter. Named Somluck Kamsing. Just the name sounds like it punches hard. It sounds like it’d make sense in a sentence, like, “My skull was just crushed by Somluck Kamsing.”
He’s filming the training and preparation for a reality television show, which will presumably be called, “Help Us Put Jean-Claude Van Damme Back Together.”
No? We can dream. Well, maybe you can’t, but I can.
