Lou O’ Bedlam’s Friday Feature: Kiva Singh

By Lou Noble on January 8th, 2010

Lot of things I want to do, this year. Some things I’d like to do differently, some things I’d like to do better. And of course, I’d change a few things from last year if I had the chance. But hey, you learn more from the things you’ve done wrong than the things you’ve done right. I hope.

And so, this year … well, I’m not much for resolutions, for making changes because a date has shifted on a calendar, but there are things I’m working on, things that’ll hopefully come through in my work.

Be kind.

That’s a good one. And a good way to bring me to Kiva.

I’d met Kiva earlier in the year at a birthday party, but it wasn’t until last July, during a trip to Las Vegas, that I really had a chance to hang out with her. The trip — well, the whole reason for the trip had gone sideways, but I had the rental car, I had the days off, so I drove out there anyway, a bit battered, gritting my teeth half during half the drive at how badly I’d been screwed over.

Heh, lots of turmoil last year. May we live in interesting times.

So I arrived in Vegas in less than the best of moods. But that didn’t deter Kiva, or my friend Laurenn (who’d graciously offered up her spare room, all her free time and attention) from showing me a good time. Which is to say, they bought me hookers and we killed a few hobos. Or maybe that was just a dream from all the mescaline they gave me?

What? IT’S VEGAS.

Point is, they were kind to me, when I desperately needed it. We ate, saw the sights, they talked me through the rough spots, hated my enemies with me, cheered my friends, and so on. And that weekend of kindness saved my ass. Kept me from dropping way down in the zero and setting fire to everything that might’ve rubbed me wrong.

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I’m thinking about that time now, thinking about what to do differently, how to make it all work better. Kindness. To folks when they need it. When they deserve it and, maybe more crucially, when they don’t.

On New Year’s Eve, the pope said we should treat each other like brothers, not rivals or enemies. And maybe I’m just in a particularly sappy mood, writing this in the early morning hours of New Year’s Day. I’ve just watched the sun come up on my favorite city, the kind of sunrise that you want to stare at until you go blind. I’ve just said “Good morning” and “Happy New Year” to several strangers on my jog today, noticing how some brightened at the sentiment and some were to surprised at the randomness to even respond.

Maybe I’m writing while still a bit high off the adrenaline rush, reading texts about friends who got lucky last night, and other friends who had themselves a piss poor evening. And I wonder if I can’t do a bit better this year by just being kinder to folk.

Can’t hurt (much) to try.