Hey, you. Yes, you. I know that you, as a guy are really concerned about your pillows. Like, terribly concerned. About whether or not they’ll match the color of your room, your hair, and also, your boyfriend. Which is why gigantic condom pillows might be a solution for you.
Condom pillows are 99% effective at preventing pregnancy. Because as soon as people see you have a giant pink pillow in the shape of a condom, your chances will be shot. Shot like that hooker last week that you don’t want to talk about. Not only is it a giant pink condom wrapper, inside the giant condom wrapper is a giant condom. So you can roll yourself up in it, and impress people at parties. Also included on the pillow: actual pockets to hold condoms. Yeah. So you can reach over during the sexy times to your giant pink plush (not that one), pull out the real thing, watch her face fall to Hades when she sobers up in a quick panic.
I imagine the conversation to invent this went something like this.
“We need new pillows! Gigantic pink condom wrappers!”
“Alright. We need security in this building. Homeless men keep breaking into my office.”
Or something similar to that. Thankfully, they’re only for sale on Etsy.
Comments
Condom Pillow
February 20th, 2010 - 12:37:39 AM
Sleep you want. Protection you trust.
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