The College Mooch’s Guide to Eating Food for Free

By Jeff Wysaski on December 1st, 2009

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Whether all your money is going to tuition or partying, sometimes less important things like food just don’t fit into your budget. Of course, if you find yourself short on cash, you could always get a job (but that’s a last resort). A better way to get by is simply by mooching off your friends, family and college services. Here are some great ways to eat food for free in college:

Join A Club

Lots of clubs offer free meals during club-affiliated meetings and events. If you’re already interested in student government, entrepreneurship or ultimate Frisbee, then bonus -– you’ll have something to talk about while you munch on free Subway subs.

However, it should be noted that you don’t necessarily have to join the club to net their free food. Many clubs are big enough that you can just show up to the meeting, act like a member for a few minutes and swipe your food on the way out the door. To keep your meal plan from getting stale, visit different clubs on different days of the week. For vegetarians, join the animal rights club. Or, for tacos, throw on a sombrero and blend into the Latin Students Union.

Mooch Off Your Friends

If you catch wind that one of your friends is ordering pizza, make a beeline to his or her place. Then, when he says, “Dude, we’re getting a pizza. Want in?” simply reply with, “Nah, I’m not that hungry.” Then, when the pizza comes, change your mind: “Oh, maybe I’ll just have this one little piece.” Then, use a second slice as your “plate” and eat that free pizza double-decker style!

Make a Visit to Ma and Pa

Making a visit home is always good for two things –- free meals and laundry service. If you’d rather not have to put up with your parents, just visit the house when they aren’t there. Then, ransack the fridge and hightail it back to campus.

Hang Out in the School Cafeteria

There are a few different ways you can get free food at the school cafeteria:

• Be a bum: ask people to help a poor classmate out with some spare change.
• Be a creep: sit at a table alone and stare at people eating. When they say, “What?” respond with, “you gonna eat that?” If you’re creepy enough, they’ll lose their appetite and give you their food.
• Be an employee: throw on a paper hat and “bus” tables. Then, take all that uneaten food to an open table and eat like a king.

(Photo By: Tostie 14)