Let the conservative political smackdown begin! Although the 2012 election is a ways off, conservative commentators are busy whittling down the possible candidates, not through the mechanisms of party politics, but rather through the magic of talk radio. A recent Washington Post poll asked these busy conservative whittlers about their picks for the race in 2012.
Prospective voters were asked which Republican hopeful best represented the party’s core values, and which candidate they would vote for if the Republicans held their primary today. The poll shows that Sarah Palin leads among GOP hopefuls in 2012, generally garnering about 17% support among likely voters.
But the poll also showed that, among regular listeners of conservative stalwarts Rush Limbaugh and Glenn Beck, she rockets to the top of the heap with 48% and 35% of Limbaugh/Beck listeners claiming that she best represents core Republican values, respectively.
Instead of battling it out in the polls in classic political fashion, Palin should challenge Mitt Romney and Mike Huckabee—her two closest competitors—to a no-holds-barred cage match of death, where the victor is the only Republican to emerge from the carnage alive. The event could be carried live on Pay-Per-View to bolster the campaign coffers of the Republican party. Forget media campaigns and verbal smackdowns—partisan politics needs a real life smackdown.
Seems like Sarah would have the upper hand in such a fight, considering that she’s had so much practice inflicting harm on the local Alaskan wildlife since she could hold a gun. And, because she spent so much time wandering the Alaskan wilderness, I’m sure she could survive in it for six months with nothing but a tattered loincloth and a Bowie knife. In fact, she probably doesn’t even need the Bowie knife. I’m sure she just brings it along just in case she has trouble fighting grizzly bears and beating moose to death with her bare hands–useful skills to have during a caged death-fight extravaganza.
That, and she’s much, much younger than the other two.
This plan also has the added benefit of being more exciting than the actual election. Sure, the recent election was a bit exciting, but can you remember a single moment of the Bush/Kerry campaign?