Hobos or Headliners? 15 Aging Rockstars: The Good and the Terrible

By The Manolith Team on November 16th, 2009

• Share
• Link to StumbleUpon
• 21 Comments

Of the men we grew up idolizing, none were more godlike than the rockstars who helped shape us through music. The men who always seemed to be in their prime, invincible and intangible, forever on stage or at wild parties with women we could only dream about. Then we grew up and realized they were just men, albeit great ones, and they too must grow old. These 15 rockstars all share the same unfortunate fate; they’ve all grown old, and they all struggle to look unaffected by it — at some point, they all fail.

Mick Jagger

Image Sources A, B

The image on the left shows that all it takes for Mick Jagger to leap from distinguished rock-god down to that guy who slings crack in the alley is a pair of old jeans and a muscle shirt. The guy has always looked strung out, but that’s not exactly a feature a man his age want’s to accentuate. Tuxedo Mick looks much more like a guy who’s been knighted.

Sting

Image Sources A, B

Sting’s rare and unfortunate t-shirt moment says “I need help paying for this PBR.” Men afflicted by the scraggly, fried hair reminiscent of the ’80s pan-fried look are usually so much more vigilant about pulling attention elsewhere, and Sting’s no different — it’s hard to find the guy in anything less than three layers, and he loves his scarves. He must have really felt his age that night: tired.

Anthony Kiedis

Image Sources A, B

Much older than most realize, Chili Peppers frontman Kiedis is now approaching 50, and fast. The look we’ve all known him for — including his aversion to shirts — is beginning to morph into something far more sinister. He’s starting to look worn out, and while he my clean up nice, he’s starting to take on that I’ve been a bartender for 30 years and hate my life look.

Jon Bon Jovi

Image Sources A, B

Love him or hate him, Bon Jovi still manages to pull off the pretty-boy look nearly every single day. Nearly, but catch him in an off moment of jeans & t-shirt and you’ve got a tired old man, who looks about four minivans too deep into middle-age to ever pull out of it.

Steven Tyler

Image Sources A, B

Taking a page from Mick Jagger’s book of strung-out, alley-slingin’ hobo, Tyler may be filthy rich but even money can’t stop him from showing this level of wear and tear. The man’s in his sixties, so we can’t expect any different — but he should stick to the polished look when off-stage. It works.

Eddie Vedder

Image Sources A, B

Now also fairly deep into his 40s, Vedder’s starting to show his age. While the guy’s always dressed along to Mugatu’s Derelict fashion standards, now he’s got neither the ’90s grunge climate nor the youth required to pull it off. Chances are, you’ve probably stood behind him at Wal Mart and just didn’t realize it.

Billy Idol

Image Sources A, B

It’s an interesting thing when the picture of a guy in his 50s dressed head to toe in ’80s punk is the good one. Idol’s colder-weather wardrobe seems to consist mostly of grommets, probably purchased from the grommet store, and they must have come with a bonus kit of sad old man, because he looks like hell.

Bono

Image Sources A, B

It may be difficult, but it is possible to catch Bono without sunglasses, and without several thousand dollars worth of designer clothing. It’s not likely to happen very often, but when it does, the scene is akin to a fancy luncheon — a fancy luncheon where security is asked to escort out the delusional old guy who keeps stealing forks and smells like Marlboro Reds.

Bruce Springsteen

Image Sources A, B

Springsteen has always prided himself on pulling off the guy next door look, and he’s always done it pretty well. Unfortunately when you hit 60 and you’re no longer in the ’80s, that look turns into the guy at the bus stop that you’re afraid to talk to because he reeks of alcohol. It’s alright though, he seems to be aware of this and tries to stick to more modern, age-appropriate attire most of the time.

Keith Richards

Image Sources A, B

Keith Richards, a name synonymous with what the hell is that guy wearing, is not losing his ability to cause fashionistas to have heart attacks. If anything, the ability is becoming more deadly. It’s strange that he manages to look classier, in the rock-god of legend sort of way, by ditching the wardrobe and just wearing leather. Sorry, that’s not leather, that’s his bare skin.

Robert Smith

Image Sources A, B

Frontman and fronthair of The Cure, Smith has made no attempt to upgrade or change his look in any other way since 1983. Unfortunately, his body has made no attempt to stay the same, and he looks ridiculous walking around today. Fixing this malady is simple: Insert guitar. Doesn’t really matter anymore, does it?

Alice Cooper

Image Sources A, B

Beginning to manifest an uncanny resemblance to Henry Winkler, Cooper has seen better days. That doesn’t stop him from looking like he owns the place, most of the time. Unfortunately, when he hits the golf course, he tends to look like an old caddy. An old caddy who still lives in a halfway-house.

Ozzy Osbourne

Image Sources A, B

The world’s just not right when a man like Ozzy Osbourne looks his best on reality shows and red-carpet events, while looking like a washed-up, overweight, over-the-hill goth guy in a cover band when on stage.

Gene Simmons

Image Sources A, B

Unless he’s on tour, Gene tends to stay out of the lens these days — except for the occasional sex tape. It’s okay if he walks around looking disturbed and out of place… He’s earned his stripes. And besides that — check out the blonde he was with.

Jimmy Page

Image Sources A, B

Jimmy Page still manages to look like his awesome self for photo-shoots and any other situation where guitars are warranted. Unfortunately, when outside those situations, this aging rocker is nearing 70, and is probably starting to fill that slot at the local bar normally reserved for the nice old man with stories. You know the guy, he’s the one who orders wine at a taproom, talks about old-timey things. Nice guy.