Sometimes, I’m embarrassed to be a man. To be carrying the burden of spermatozoa. This is one of those times.
Apparently he missed the first day in sperm doctor school. Which is where a lecturer would get in front of the class and go, “No matter how tempting it is. Do not inject things with your sperm. Just because you can, doesn’t mean you should.” In what would be a hilarious urban legend, if it weren’t real, a Connecticut fertility doctor is accused of pushing his man-seed all up in one of his patients that was trying to get pregnant. How’d the couple discover it? The woman’s husband was black, and the children were born looking hilariously white. So they got DNA tests for the buggers, and guess what? Random spouse, you were not the father. That’s not the worst part. The worst part is the woman tried to get pregnant repeatedly, so the dude probably did it a bunch of times.
Okay, that’s gotta be the saddest family situation ever. I just hope they’re a happy, balanced family. You know, cause it’d suck to be fighting at the end of your marriage, knowing things are winding down. She’d be like, “WE NEED TO STAY TOGETHER FOR THE KIDS,” and he’d be like, “WHAT KIDS? THE KIDS THAT AREN’T MINE BECAUSE YOU WENT TO THE FERTILITY DOCTOR I DIDN’T LIKE? AND HE PLAYED AN INTENSE GAME OF HIDE THE JISM?!”
The couple sued the doctor, Dr. Ben Ramaley. He settled out of court, and was allowed to keep his license to practice in Connecticut. So beware ladies, for you may be inseminated in the night in Connecticut.
Also, this is exactly the plot of a Law & Order: SVU episode. Whether the Doctor or the couple saw it first is unclear.
Comments
Barry
November 16th, 2009 - 10:59:48 AM
guess there could be worse outcomes than being secretly impregnated by a doctor. i mean, if you're going to be secretyl impregnated, without consent, it may as well be the doctor, and not the bum down the street, or the kid at the 7-11. got to be decent odds the genes are a-okay.