Prince of Persia Trailer Released

By Mark Lorenz on November 5th, 2009

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“Prince of Persia” is the epitome of contemporary Hollywood bloat. First off, it’s a film based on a video-game, most of which are never good. Second off, it’s produced by Jerry Bruckheimer. Who’s insanely wealthy, but lately been scrimping on story. And third, it’s got the whitest actor in Hollywood, Jake Gyllenhaal, portraying a Persian man. And now the trailer’s out.

“Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time” was an epic videogame available for the Xbox, that was pretty much the most ridiculously fun Xbox game in history. So the movie people decided to port it over to the screen, adapted by people who gave you such classics as “The Uninvited”, and, uhh, “The Uninvited”. And also, the forthcoming “Sorcerer’s Apprentice”. I don’t know if that’s indicative of quality of the film, but I’m wagering that there will be wigs. Oh, there will be wigs. The plot? A good prince teams up with a rival princess to stop an angry ruler from unleashing a sandstorm that could destroy the world.

The verdict? Nice visuals. But for some reason, not only are the Persians not Persian, they speak English in a British accent. Perhaps borrowing a page from “300″, or “Troy”? When the Greeks spoke with poorly accented British lingo? And I love how all of the trailer’s exposition is just spoken by one woman. We’ll call her Exposition Lady. She say lines like, “You must take the Gilded Kitten to the Mineshaft of Destiny.” It’ll be interesting to see how big budget movies pan out in the near future. Cause this looks ridiculous, but that usually doesn’t stop people from watching them.