Sharks are ridiculously awesome animals. They’ve been unchanged killing machines for millions of years, they can repel even the nastiest of diseases, and now, researchers are finding out that synthesizing shark features is also, incredibly useful. For example, synthetic sharkskin.
Real sharkskin has a tooth-like surface that prevents parasitic bacteria from attaching itself. This, of course, enables the shark to go around, killing unchallenged. Whales do not, so they all get killed by the Japanese, as demonstrated on this week’s South Park. So a Florida-based company, Sharklet has noticed this and decided that it’s a good idea to try and develop it, without killing hordes of sharks. And what’ve they come up with? By making a surface filled with microscopic diamond-shaped bumps, they’ve developed synthetic material that can fight off bacteria from forming and superbacteria, which is resistant from drugs, from growing unchecked to kill us all as a populace.
The new invention is being tested out, but researchers hope they’ll be able to put it on materials that people touch a lot, to prevent the spread of bacteria. Here’s hoping it won’t chafe your mum’s boobs too badly. God, that’s the lamest joke I’ve made today.
I’d like to formally apologize to everyone and offer a cookie as compensation. I’m so sorry.

















oh yeah? well they should put this shark synthetic suit on yr dick — cause it get’s touched a lot!
sharks to fight swine! yes, I would like to don a bacteria repelling suit right about now.