Never Have Sex with a Prostitute In the Philippines

I know, I know, I have as hard a time obeying that advice as anyone. I can’t count the times I’ve been invited to a Dodger game, or to bowling, but I was too busy chartering a one man single-prop prop plane  to the Philippines to pay a woman to have sex with me.  Honestly, my friends are tired of it, and there has been talk of an intervention.  But after watching this YouTube clip showing how prostitutes in the Philippines “recycle” condoms, I can guarantee you you’ll never want to have sex with one of them again. Or, if you’re like me, you’ll still have sex with them and then regret it later.

Probably the most awkward situation I ever got into with a Filipino prostitute was the time I was at a Ralph’s Supermarket in downtown LA, and this woman and I reached for some baby corns in the salad bar at the same time, and it turned out to be a Filipino Prostitute I had had sex with once in 1997. My face totally went red, and she was all like, “I gave birth to your son after you left, but I had to sell him to an underground slave ring to buy insulin for my Pimp, who is diabetic.”  Boy, let me tell you, there was egg on my face.