Off yesterday’s post, the only thing dumber than Stupid Things People Have Named Their Kids is stupid things people have named themselves. Because apparently American freedom means having the right to change your name to Romanceo Sir Tasty Maxibillion.
…Faster Than Superman Spiderman Batman Wolverine The Hulk And The Flash Combined
A British teen changed his name to this, shortly before being cut from his high school’s track team.
This one’s a tie for two equally stupid people who changed their names to Internet things. The first, Mitch Maddox, did it as part of a 2000 publicity stunt; the latter, Terri Iligan, was paid by Golden Palace for changing her name to an advertisement for them. Both made a lot of money. Maybe they weren’t so stupid after all.
James Dr No From Russia with Love Goldfinger Thunderball…
… You Only Live Twice On Her Majesty’s Secret Service Diamonds Are Forever Live and Let Die The Man with the Golden Gun The Spy Who Loved Me Moonraker For Your Eyes Only Octopussy A View to a Kill The Living Daylights Licence to Kill Golden Eye Tomorrow Never Dies The World Is Not Enough Die Another Day Casino Royale Bond
David Fern changed his name to this because he liked James Bond so much. For some reason, they let him.
A phone phreaker. Also may have been a stripper, or a My Little Pony character.
Radical Aided Super N*gger
An African-American activist who wanted his name to reflect his enthusiastic feelings on the topic. Also may have been a black superhero.
Romanceo Sir Tasty Maxibillion
A guy in Wisconsin who apparently wanted to have the most awesome name ever. Good for him.
Aaron Schwarz, started the website www.givemeaname.com, and invited people to choose/vote on a name for him, ultimately paying $25,000 to the winner to change his name to this. Now this guy is stupid.
Trout Fishing in America
A California teen changed his name to this, after a Richard Brautigan novella. I mean, I know we’re all huge Richard Brautigan fans, but this seems like a little much.
American martial artist Jon Koppenhaver changed his name to this so he could keep fighting under the name when another “War Machine” entered the league. Also, he wanted to scare the hell out of his opponents.
Originally named Bill Holland, this painting contractor kept adding Zs to his name so that people could find him “in the back of the phone book”. You’d think just a couple Z’s would do it, but he had to beat out Zelda Zzzwramp and Vladimir Zzzzzzabakov.