Recent Blogs
Lil’ Wayne and His Daddy Hit With Lawsuit
Posted by Mark Lorenz – 4 Comments
Lil' Wayne is one of the most enigmatic figures in music today. Nobody knows how he comes up with his brilliant lyrics, invented from thin air without use of paper. Or his killer beats that he programs himself on drum machines. Truly every inch of h [...]
Synthetic Sharkskin Can Repel Bacteria
Posted by Mark Lorenz – 2 Comments
Sharks are ridiculously awesome animals. They've been unchanged killing machines for millions of years, they can repel even the nastiest of diseases, and now, researchers are finding out that even when they synthesize features that belong to sharks, [...]
Edgy Snowflake Adam Lambert’s Single Sounds Like Everything Else
Posted by Mark Lorenz – 46 Comments
For months, we've been beset by the American Idol hype machine, telling us their contestants are unbelievable, super-human singers, capable of re-shaping the slowly collapsing music industry into a beautiful butterfly. Adam Lambert being the front-r [...]
Fruit Bats May Hold The Key To Blowjobs
Posted by Mark Lorenz – 2 Comments
No, seriously. And this isn't a sort of Zelda-like quest, either, where you must track down a fruit bat and make him unlock a secret door with methods we will not describe here. To further understand the functional purposes of fellatio in animals, s [...]
If I See You Drinking This Blood Energy Drink, I Will Assault You With A Stake
Posted by Mark Lorenz – 2 Comments
Man, sometimes I sit in dark rooms, staring at the mirrors with the windows locked, and door shut. Just staring, in the dark. Pondering why we're here and reflecting on how much easier it would be to be dead. Then I think, I should drink blood. But [...]
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