Soliloquy: The Yacht You Shouldn’t Think About

By Mark Lorenz on September 16th, 2009

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Every now and then, I have a breakdown and start looking at yachts that I may or may not be able to afford – depending on how lucky I am or which third-world country I decide to suddenly take over in a coup. In this case, it’s a yacht called the Soliloquy. It is named after the activity that I would constantly do, were I able to afford a yacht called the Soliloquy. It’s 190 feet long, and I kid you not, according to the design video I just watched, were you even to look at it, a befuddling chorus of angels would start singing. For two and a half minutes. It’s powered by a mixture of solar, wind, and hybrid marine technologies, making it that much more awesome and unattainable. Seriously, you could set out in the high seas without fuel, just roughing it, in your 190 foot yacht. The best tech in the world. Prior to the Soliloquy, the yacht du jour was the Trilobis 65, as understandably celebrated in the 2002 November issue of Popular Mechanics. It’s a four-level living structure, which contains an underwater viewing bulb form where you can watch the fish, and enjoy your millions of dollars. Why are you still reading this? You will never own a yacht.

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Which makes me wonder, how badly has the luxury yacht industry been hit by the recession? Apparently not that bad. Paul Allen, ex-Microsoft honcho, now hosts parties in his luxury submarine during the Cannes Film Festival.

Which gives me a scintilla, the tiniest scintilla of hope, that I can kill Paul Allen and steal his submarine. Like a combination of James Bond and American Psycho. Then pet my Persian kitty and laugh maniacally.