Melanie Oudin is currently blowing up the tennis world, playa. She’s a southern peach that just smacked down Russia’s darling Maria Sharapova with good tennis, and good ol’ country cooking, pushing her to the fourth round of the U.S. Open. She’s the youngest American player in the Open since Serena Williams ten years ago. Which bodes well for American tennis. Also, she celebrated with her mom right after her victory. Which is adorable. Not only did she defeat Sharapova, it came in a three-hour marathon. And anybody that can compete in tennis for three hours, can compete in my heart forever.
For years, I have wanted someone to knock Maria Sharapova off her pedestal, ever since she started taking pictures of her dog on my television screen. A dog that for some reason, spoke like Antonio Banderas. Now, we have one, that’s homegrown, and hot. Unfortunately in most of her pictures, she’s giving the best tennis face she can possibly give. Meaning she looks like she’s going to follow you down and alley and kill you, because you’ve said something about her beloved mother.
So cheers to you, Melanie Oudin. Hopefully soon, you’ll join the Williams sisters not just as champions of the court, but of rap songs.
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