Top 5 Science Fiction/Fantasy Movie Weapons

By Akela Talamasca on August 21st, 2009

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Say what you will about the science fiction/fantasy genre; there’s no denying that it’s given us some of the coolest weapons never known to mankind. Who hasn’t wanted to tote an M41-A Pulse Rifle and go charging down the street blasting away left and right? Or take control of a mech straight out of any decent anime? But when it comes to some of the most iconic, must-have damage-dealing pieces of hardware ever to grace the big screen, there are 5 that immediately spring to mind. Here are the Top 5 Science Fiction/Fantasy Movie Weapons, in ascending order.

5. The Weirding Modules from “Dune”

Those of us who had read “Dune” before seeing the movie wondered where in the hell David Lynch got the idea for these things, but as a futuristic concept, they make for great visuals. Turns out that Lynch simply didn’t think the book’s martial art, known as the “Weirding Way” would work well on-screen, so his bizarre and fertile imagination provided us these sonic weapons. The best thing about these babies? Unlimited ammo, as long as your vocal cords hold out. Then again, how often can you shout “chaaaaa-SOOK!” before it’s time for some hot tea?

4. The Proton Packs from “Ghostbusters”

“Whoa whoa whoa … nice shootin’, Tex!” You know what’s better than discrete bullets of energy? A steady stream, like the most destructive fire hose you’ve ever seen. The Proton Pack is bulky, emits an ominous hum, and probably leaks radiation, but for sheer morale, there’s nothing like being able to lay waste to a room by sweeping the nozzle back and forth within it. Really, the only problem would be how hard a time you’d have preventing yourself from purposefully crossing the streams just to see what would happen. You know you’d do it. Nice knowing you.

3. The Identity Disks from “Tron”

Who’d have thought frisbees could be so lethal? Yet “Tron” induced a generation of kids to pretend they were actually programs in a computer, battling to the death with flying disks made of energy. It’s decades later, and the “Tron Legacy” movie has kept the frisbee motif, upgrading them from the solid body models of the ’70s to the hollow body types of the ’90s. Bonus: when your Identity Disk lands on the neighbor’s roof, you can bring it down with your mind alone, saving Dad a trip to the shed for the ladder.

2. The Glaive from “Krull”

The Glaive has a lot of the same abilities as the Identity Disk does — speed, killing power, operation by sheer will — but with one standout attribute: five awesome shining claw-like blades to really give it that heavy metal look and feel. If threatened by two dudes, one wielding a frisbee, and the other brandishing a spinning sawblade, who are you going to fear more? When Colwyn lost the Glaive, stuck in the Beast’s chest, I cried like a baby. To this day, I can’t look at a starfish without picking it up and tossing it at the nearest person. It never comes back.

1. The Lightsaber from “Star Wars”

There could be no other number one on any rational list of awesome weaponry. What can’t you do with a lightsaber? They look great, they sound great, you look great using them, and the only thing they can’t cut through is another lightsaber. Hell, they even come in designer colors! And just when you thought they couldn’t get any more incredifantastimazing, Darth Maul strolls in with two of them joined hilt to hilt to make a friggin’ double-bladed staff. For fuck’s sake, if that didn’t make you scream like a Girl Scout and simultaneously wet yourself and pass out from pure geekery, then I don’t know why you’re even reading this. Go back to watching “Manimal”, you waste of carbon — and keep it down, the adults are talking.