17 Things Most Men Do In Secret (But Won’t Admit)

By The Manolith Team on August 3rd, 2009

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We all have secrets, some that could be monumentally embarrassing if they were exposed to the fairer sex. Since nobody enjoys humiliation, unless you happen to be into S&M or something, evidence of some of your less than manly habits must be deeply buried. So what’s manly? Actually, you might be surprised. There are some things that many men enjoy that they’ll never acknowledge to anyone, for fear of seeming soft. However, they may not realize how common their quirks are because they’re so artfully hidden in order to avoid ridicule. Today we reveal 17 things that men do that they’ll never admit. Go ahead and laugh at the guys who do these things, but we bet you find yourself on this list at least once. It’s okay, we won’t tell.

Enjoy a Good Chick Flick

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We refused to watch Thelma and Louise. We hated Sixteen Candles. We bitched and moaned when we were dragged to the theater to see The Wedding Planner and The Notebook. We watch this crap just to make the girls happy, right? Not entirely true. Some seriously good movies just happen to fall into the “chick flick” genre, and although we put up a fight and profess a distaste for chick flicks, lots of guys secretly enjoy them.

Cry at a Movie

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The reason we hate tearjerkers is because, well, they’re tearjerkers. No man really wants to cry in front of anyone, let alone over some stupid movie. Right? It’s okay. We cried during Terms of Endearment and All Dogs Go To Heaven too; we just pretended to have a coughing fit or something incredibly urgent to do in the other room to cover it up. It’s okay to be touched by a film, even moved to tears, just don’t let her see your emotional outburst or you could lose some man points.

Primping, Preening and Grooming

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Do you think everyone at the gym and down at the pool thinks your back and chest are naturally smooth and hairless? Men like to look good, but can’t be seen putting as much effort into it as women do. We try on clothes and check ourselves in the mirror from all angles to make sure the look is solid. Some of us even go to the salon for secret waxing sessions to stay smooth. The unibrow has got to go too, so we take care of that privately as well. No one will ever see you looking like the caveman you are, so there’s no need to admit that you do put a lot into your sharp look.

Fake Spray Tans

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Of course your skin is naturally orange. We all believe that. No matter how natural you may think it looks and how much you may deny it, everyone realizes that you went for the spray tan. It’s okay, you’re still a man. A bronze man who fake tans.

Look at Women’s Magazines

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So you want to keep all of your odd habits a secret, but you’re curious about what’s in Cosmo? We know, those covers do suck you in. Lots of men flip through women’s magazines. They’ll never own up to knowing what this month’s sex Q & A is about, but they do like to stay informed of the other team’s game plan. It’s cool, if you get caught with one of these mags, you can just say the girl on the cover is so hot you were looking for more pictures of her. Of course that’s going to open another can of worms entirely, so try not to get caught.

Cuddling and Pet Names

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Of course your girl knows about this one, because she’s there, but when you’re around the guys, your cute little sugar bear will have to deal with being called by her real name. Privately though, guys do like a little cuddling and a little sweet talk from time to time, as long as it stays private.

Cheat or Continue an Affair

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We all have our weaknesses, and this is a major one. Of course some men cheat, and many won’t admit it even when they’re caught. “Oh, you have pictures? I can explain that.” “I was just helping her open her hotel room door.” “Funniest thing, I tripped and fell on top of her and my dick just went inside for a second.” “It’s not what it looks like.” Other men may immediately apologize, say it meant nothing, ask for forgiveness and continue the affair anyway. Not the greatest game plan, but we’re not judging.

Casual Gaming

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Zuma anyone? Casual gaming just isn’t very manly, or is it? Simple games are generally perceived to be more of a woman thing, but a recent study found that men love these games just as much – they just don’t admit it. Hardcore gaming is so much more masculine, in theory anyway.

Enjoy Chick Music

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You may not have the CDs in your car, but you’ll bop to the Spice Girls if they’re on the radio. It’s okay to listen to Celine Dion if you’re in your girl’s car, no one will know but you, and the people laughing at you at the stop light as you sing along and belt out the high notes. Your secret is safe with us.

Check Out Other Guys

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No heterosexual man wants to admit that he notices anything at all about other men. The truth is, you do notice other men, much in the same way women notice other women. You’re not obsessing about his shoes or man purse, but you see that he’s been to the gym. It’s okay, just get your ass to the gym if you want pecs and guns like that.

Confide in Their Mother

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What’s wrong with being mama’s boy? Nothing, if you’re asking your mother. Plenty of men confide in their mothers more than their girlfriends or wives. The main reason for never admitting this simple fact boils down to female jealousy. It’s best if mom and your girl get along, right? So they both have to think they are number one. It’s tricky, but this may be one of the most important secrets to keep. This and, of course, the cheating thing.

Continue an Argument For No Valid Reason

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You’re always 100% right, even when you’re wrong. That’s just how it is. During a verbal sparring matchup, you may sometimes realize your opponent does have a valid point. That’s no reason to back down. Just continue the argument until you can devise a viable exit strategy and end it there – without admitting anything. It’s the man way.

Worry About the Penis Size

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Does size really matter to women? Some say no, and the honest ones will tell you straight up, yes. We know this and that’s why nearly every man is concerned about whether his member is adequate. Male enhancement products are hot, although finding the men who try them is nearly impossible. We’re not going to admit it, ever.

Giggle at Babies

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Cute babies are hard for anyone to resist. However, giggling and cooing at a baby, especially when you’re not the father, can feel a little less than masculine. Babies are frickin’ adorable though and can be quite irresistible. It’s not just the women who are captivated by their charms. Same goes for puppies and kittens too, although nobody needs to know that.

Keep Up With the Latest Gossip

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We like being in on the latest news just as much as women do, we’re just not as silly about it. Men like gossip, and if there is no safe and secret outlet to quench this thirst, there’s always TMZ, Perez Hilton and the tabloid rags to glance at in the grocery checkout line. Then there’s the ultimate gossip – the sports gossip – ESPN.

Enjoy Being Nurtured

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You’re the man, you’re supposed to take care of your woman, right? Well, sometimes guys like to be taken care of too. You may not admit it, but when she dotes on you it makes you feel cared for and special. Basking in these good times privately is great, but it can be excruciatingly uncomfortable if she insists on smoothing your hair or dabbing at your mouth with a napkin in public.

Fear Rejection

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It’s not just women who want to be wanted. For single guys, striking out can be very common. It’s rough out there and the rules of the game are never clear. The last thing anyone wants is to pour their heart out and have it stomped to dust by a four inch heel. When this happens, it can really be a big blow to the ego – so much so that it prevents many men from taking chances they want to take. Just remember: No risk, no reward. Confidence is sexy, own it and never let them see you sweat.