Top 5 Rejected iPhone Apps

By Ned Hepburn on June 12th, 2009

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It seems to have become almost standard to have an iPhone these days. Just go to any college campus or any major metropolitan area and walk into any good bar and you’d probably come up with at least 30 iPhone users after a matter of minutes. Needless to say, the iPhone App store is a questionable place indeed half the time

1. The Baby Shaker

This was either the funniest thing in the entire world when we heard about this or the single most disturbing. For the low price of 99 cents you could purchase an game where you “shook the phone” to “make the baby quiet”. Of course, this led to many complaints. Obviously. Because you don’t want to be telling the public to shake their babies, do you? No. Of course you don’t. Because dead babies are not funny in any way.

2. The shakey boobs app

iBoob was an amazing app that never saw the light of day with the exception of a few grainy YouTube videos of early beta versions of the app. Basically, you controlled the size and shape of the boobs, jiggled the phone, and – presto! – the boobs jiggled as well. Fucking genius.

3. Me So Holy

Me So Holy was a simple app that allowed you to place your face over a major religious figure. Per-say you wanted to be crucified. Simply take a picture of yourself, load it into the app, press ‘Jesus On The Cross’ and there you were. Or you could make your girlfriend a nun. Or Ganesh. Amazingly, Apple refuses to stock this in their app store, which makes little to no sense given all the crappy apps they have in there cluttering up the place. This one was kind of funny.

4. PdaNet

PdaNet is a program that makes your iPhone an internet provider for your computer using your phone’s wireless 3G network. Tada. Simple idea, right? Would make millions of dollars? Well, Apple and AT&T figured that out and blocked PdaNet – a brilliant, fast working, simple to use program – from ever appearing on the app store. And to their loss: AT&T now expects users to cough up an extra $30 a month just to tether their iPhones to their laptops (while jailbreaking the phone and installing PdaNet is pretty much free…)

5. I Am Rich

This app famously cost $999. All it was was a picture of a jewel in the center of your screen. Yep, you paid nearly $1000 for a picture – a fucking JPEG – of a jewel. The guy found 8 buyers before it was yanked from the store, so it just goes to show that people really are that stupid.