Tasered Man Has Smallest Penis, But Biggest Balls

By Akela Talamasca on April 24th, 2009

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tased“Everything about this moment is beautiful!” This was the mantra repeated continually by the regrettably-naked man at the recent Coachella Music and Arts Festival, as he was surrounded by three policemen and told to put his clothes back on. Despite numerous entreaties by both the cops and a few onlookers to comply, the man kept tossing his shed clothing away from him, succeeding in frustrating the constables enough for them to lay hands on him in an attempt to get him dressed.

The longer the scene went on — and the video is over five minutes in length — the more agitated the crowd became, with yells to the policemen to lay off and leave the guy alone. The man in question, however, remained fairly calm throughout, insisting over and over that everything was beautiful. Finally, he was wrestled to the ground amid a chorus of boos from the encircling crowd, which turned to angry screams a few seconds later as the man was repeatedly tasered by one of the policemen.

Now, I’ve never been tasered myself, and I assume there are tasers with variable levels of strength, but I have to admit being impressed by the man’s ability to both remain composed — such as he was — under assault, and that he was able to take so many hits without being visibly incapacitated. Indeed, after the third time, I was hoping he’d just pass out and put an end to the entire scene, but he kept going, and the cops kept tasering him, and I’m surprised the whole thing failed to turn into a riot. Watch the video below.

Comments

  1. dan uyemura

    April 24th, 2009 - 12:11:16 PM

    permission to speak freely officer? you're fucked.

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  2. easy321

    April 24th, 2009 - 4:10:19 PM

    Have you ever wondered why or how the police got the nickname "pig" and the firemen "Heros"?

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  3. DR

    April 24th, 2009 - 7:00:49 PM

    glad he lived. else it would have been more bad PR for the tazer manufacturing company.

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  4. maria

    April 26th, 2009 - 1:08:03 AM

    OMG.. that was the funniest video i have EVER scene and the writing was pure poetry lol. I enjoyed this entire post. lol.

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  5. Rodrigo

    April 26th, 2009 - 2:25:32 PM

    Great teasing! Well diserve...

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  6. johnifer

    April 27th, 2009 - 4:10:57 AM

    Only in america!

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  7. Catherine Haig Bonjukian

    April 29th, 2009 - 5:52:39 PM

    Maria - the word is SEEN not SCENE obviously you are a product of your illiterate generation of texting boobs and cellular phone geeks. It was not funny. It was sad. We live in a country where the police have the right to do anything include harass a citizen just because his clothes are off. rodrigo - go back and live in Mexico - you don't have a clue as to how painful tazing is and mostly because you can't seem to be able to spell it correctly. Are you related to Maria? In america if one shots a cop - they go up for the death penalty - what makes a cop's life more important than the citizens they are swore to protect? Our country's laws suck and have to change or there will be another civil revolution and it's coming sooner than you think.

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  8. Neil Boden

    August 20th, 2009 - 10:17:49 PM

    That was stupid. What is wrong with those cops? No freaking judgment. It was worth it to them to risk his heart stopping in order so they can forcibly carry him away and charge him.

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  9. ayla c

    February 18th, 2010 - 2:41:38 PM

    dats nasty

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  10. Browner

    February 25th, 2010 - 10:05:40 AM

    Catherine Haig Bonjukian- your so full of shit, you have no life for correcting someone on a Comment page, that guy was being a idiot he deserved to get taserd with his little pecker hanging out, people like you need to just go roll over and die, he could have aids thos cops dont want to risk there health with a low life fagget who takes his clothes off in a public place, thats gross, that guy gives the states a terrible name. I hope your happy for supporting the ugly small dick freak

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  11. Anonymous

    February 28th, 2010 - 4:43:55 AM

    These pigs deserves to die.

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  12. some little ignorant kid

    March 2nd, 2010 - 6:15:58 AM

    the reason why firemen are called heroes is because they can't arrest you, cops can arrest you, therefore, people call them pigs and to the idiot who tried to correct people on grammar, it's shoots a cop, not shots a cop, fucking retard. in relation to the video, the guy deserved to get tased, he was told numerous times to put his clothes back on, and he didn't listen, and then he resisted arrest, the taser was used well within the boundaries of using one, all the guy wanted was a show.

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  13. James

    March 16th, 2010 - 8:30:14 PM

    You notice the Nazi style cops getting a kick out of torturing this guy...that knee to the abdomen area was just one part of the excessive force...this is your criminal cops enforcing the criminal US Nazi gov't Talk about SS in the US...never laugh when your rights are gone...people go back to fluoride in the drinking water brain gone zombies...go back to your bottle of beer & the football game...you don't deserve freedom...in fact you have already lost it

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